CHAPTER36

Hey guys,sorry  for being late jad I had alot of issues to deal with! Anyway enjoy the post and u love you♡

this post dedicated to all the ones who waited so long for the chapter

and special dedication goes for my beauty♡ @mkal7x


Now enjoy and TELL ME WHAT DO YOU THINK, in the box below! Ask! Dm! Or a mention :D!

 Ok wayd grgt enjoy now:::



all of the people was freaked out and was staring, dalia en9fag wayha!

Then suddenly khaled started beating a guy from the same table so hard that all of his face veins were out!

I dont know how but the place was crowded with people and there    undeniable curiosity !

We got from the table fast and we kept hearing khaled voice! Shouting!

We was about to walk when one of my cousins, in the same table that khaled was setting in..

7amanie approached us: jawa, khaled ygoul bsr3a rdaw your room!, ana aw9lkm!    

Dalia: sh9ayr? Shnu 9ayr! I could.. actually everybody could see those worried ayes..they were enough   prove..of her love toward khaled
                                                     
7amanie: wa7d kan bl6awla, mu khush wa7d yngal 3anna le3eb..g3d yt7cha 3nkm maydre ankm t9erulna fa khaled gam 3laih

Dalia nazlt  ras'ha, I laughed w awrad chnha mzhrya l2na these are my mother side cousins fa matdre shsalfa::

7amanie walked us to the room, we thanked him, we were deadly tired so we went to sleep, I didnt actually. .

All day I could forget what happened earlier for seconds, but now being alone in the dark! I cant stop remembering, breaking, thinking

And the most hurtful thing is that I had His heart, but I lost it..

A tear fell from my aye as I fail, fail from getting him out from my mind! And heart..

I woke up that day, I found awrad staring at me..

Jawa: mmm shfech?

Awrad: gulay sh9ayr?

Jawa: ahh shnu ma 9ar?

Awrad: bader?

Jawa: fe ghaira?

Awrad t7chay...

Jawa: tathkren lma gtlch bnru7 baithum ana w ghezlan? W mswenle Amazing night! At last they gave me gifts, klman 36ane even bader!yes bader 36ane beautiful tifanny lock and a letter!

I kept quiet then I got the letter that I hid under my pellow, yes i take it everywhere I hand it to awrad.

When she first started reading,  a smile hung up on her face!.. but that didn't last long!

She was in a shock and I can see that she is avoiding removing her ayes from the paper so they wouldn't meet mine..

Slowly She came and  sat next to me..

Awrad: don't worry I will be on ur side and I will be the shoulder that you cry on w I will not tell u it's okay w nothing happened I will not lie, for my self im Shocked .. so what about u? But don't worry life will move on..

I couldn't hold my tears, she side hugged me and I slept in her arms, and the words *move on* kept revolving in my mind.....

We spent those three days amazingly..

I entered our house with my tired face and holding my bag..

I haven't found anyone, I remembered that ghezlan's wedding is after 3 weeks and she need to get everything ready...

I went to the bathroom took a relaxing bath and after that I prayed and and slept..

I woke up the next morning at 7 o'clock because I slept early! Everyone was Sleeping so I went took a refreshing bath and wore my jogging clothes and went out,  I switched on my music and I started running! Letting all the energy out!

I went back home! I found my father up! Slmt 3laihh..

Dad: jawa 7bebty sway jan6tch 7g elsufar! 3rs ekhtch enshala ma bugala shay!

Jawa: enshala!

I went up stairs and took a shower, I got out my bag and called the maid 3shan tnathefhaa! I played my music and I started picking what I want to take..after 2 hours I chatted with fahad my cousin, he told me that there is a really big dust storm coming! I checked the window and the sky was orange! Wow, weather elkuwait? Maytha7ek.

I called mom to check on her and ghezlan because they were out shopping and stuff!

I called my mother..

Mom: hala jawa

Jawa: yuma yala rdaw! The sky is orange w btyye dust storm!

 mom: jawa ana t7t bl9ala, ekhtch ely 6al3a w lat7aten!

I hung up the phone and directly called ghezlan..

Jawa: ha dude wainch?

Ghezlan: kane on the forth ring road!

Jawa: dshaity elsurra? Ghezlan: not yet!
       
Jawa: eljaw ykhr3 derbalch w yebay mac please :D
                   
ghezlan: zain bye!

After that, I called sara my friend and we was talking about this summer, and  the best way to spend it!                  


*2 hours passed by*

Jawa: yumma ghezlan t2khrt!

Mom: ee dgay 3laiha                        

I called her and  her phone was switched off, the weather was getting worser and my mind started making the worst scenario of how this day will continue... Jawa: yumma mughlagh tlfonha! Yma khnru7 mac please ndwrha mnak!
                                               
Mom: Bsr3a bdlay!

I took a hoodie and a crocs and went down stairs..
                                                     
Khaled: ana ana arou7 g3daw!    

Both me and my mother ignored him and went out!





My mom started the ingine and fear was concurring our hearts..

We drove to mac in this bad weather! We found no one..

Us! Thats when I knew that there is something happened to ghezlan!

Jawa: l7gay eles3af yuma!

Mom: bsmlah!

                                                              

We followed the car and it was heading back to mac way! Our hearts was pounding.. 

We was passing mac and still following the ambulance! 

Thats when!

Jawa: YUMA SHUFAY ELMERCEDES 3ND MAC DRIVE THRU!..

my mom drove fast to the u turn and went straight to mac!

We stopped the car in middle the street! And we checked! And it was ghezlan!!!!!!

Tears was falling, happy tears! I got out of the car and went to hug her!

She was ordering in her car and when she saw me, tn7t! W th7kt=))

My mom went back home and I entered ghezlan's car! 

I was crying and hugging her and she was laughing..

Ghezlan: kla mnch khletne a6lb ghala6=))

I told her what happened and she didn't stopped laughing:: We went home with our meals and enjoyed the night...

CHAPTER35

THIS POST IS SPECAILLYY WRITENNN FOR MY  BIRTHDAY GIRLL ASEEL KHALEDD♡♡ I LOVE YVAND HAPPY LATE BIRTHDAAAAYY PRINCESSSS♡♡♡








" first of all I hope you liked the gift, second of all I want to confess something..

Thakren lma e3trftlch anne a7bch? W rdaitene, mne kubrty eb 3aine w 7baitch zyada! 3umre ma7bait bnt, knty awal wa7da dkhlt glbi, gelt fe ett7maal anha t7bne, bas matbe tklmne! W d3ait rabbe yktbch le, w youm 3rft anch ekht 3rostna, eldnya magdrt tshelni mn elfr7a.. bas m3a  elayam la7tht tjnbch le, la7tht grbch m3a 3yal 3amch w mkantch bainhm w knt aghar, w shft wayd nass 7a6en 3ainhm 3laich w anch mu yamme! Mne thagt fene eldnya 3sht eb swad w khtrbt 7yaty, lakn 7awalt ya jawa ane ansach w...

NSAITCH, w mshat 7yaty w 7baitle wa7da w qreban bkh6bha, w abech togfen m3ay eb 3ersi. Entay ekhty elthanya w mkanch mthl ekhty w ghalya 3alay! Bas 7bait aabyn lch ane t3daitch, l2na adre knty mu mrta7a! W 3shan may9er Ay e7raj, happy birthday enjoy it xo"

The time i finished reading, the paper was filled with tear drops, I cant breath! I want to die! I faked heart coldness toward him..just trying to forget him, but as I can see!he is the one who did... Its painful its heart breaking..

I ? Was his first love? But not anymore..
I was the reason of his wreckness and sadness? But no.. not anymore!

You was the first and biggest secret... the passion I held  for you was and still is so strong. . . The love I had was big but restrained.. I loved you with the first look and last word.. BUT, you didn't know and you still dont know! Maybe you are reading this, these words that are directly from my heart and for a certain,  you still dont know.. the you are the king of my heart.... In that moment, I knew that the destiny will not brought us together. Never.



I slept with tears filling my ayes, I felt my phone viberating and I know its birthday wishes because it was already 12:00 am, I tried cheering my self! But I couldn't, I slept..
                                                         
I woke up with red puffy ayes,   I took a deep breathe and I tried forgetting, and being happy because iitsss my  birthday♡♡♡♡, I opened my phone. .to find twitter and dm's notifications,whataap! Messeges! And a missed call from awrad and sara and dalia at exactly 12:00 am:')♡♡♡
                 
I started replaying and replaying when awrad joined call with dalia!

They started singing w shouting! Awrad and jawa: HAAAPPPY BORRRTHDAYYY TO YOUUUUUUUUU.

Jawa: abay 7amer a7bkmmmm!

Awrad: aahh nadre

Dalia: sway jan6tchh 7g b7r bye

And they hung up!

I washed my face and went downstairs to ask my parent, that when...

All the family started singing, w there was American breakfast with candles and and baloons!

I love my familyyyyy♡♡

I hugged them w thanked them w g3dna nakel w 9wrw my reaction!

Jawa: yala 36une elhdaya! Mom: ehya hadya wa7da mna klna!

Jawa: 3yal it must be big:)::

Khaled: ttwq3en shnu?
                                 
Jawa: madre yala 36uneee!

Ghezlan had something behind  her back, and saloom was holding the camera! Madre laish :)::

Okay... it was an small envelope..

My face is straight, ena mayth7k! Salom was laughing and filming w klhm y6al3une w yth7kun..
           
I slowly opened the envelope w tn7t! Then I STARTED SCREAMING AND DANCING AND HUGGING THEM!!! IT WAS E 3 TICKETS FOR DAVID GUETTA CONCERT!

It was after 3 weeks in spain, all my family travels to spain every summer! AND THIS TIME IM GOING TO DAVID GUETTA concert!

I thanked them very much! W my mom told me that dalia and awrad b6l3une;p!

The day till now is amazing!!! I took a shower w made my bag, I went down stairs and dalia and jawa was waiting with my family!

Dad: yala akheran khl9t, derbalkm ok?

All of us: enshala, bye!

Before we leave they put an head band around my ayes 3shan mashuf wain bnru7, obouy th7k 3laina and we left! We rode the car, dalia started driving!After 15 minutes we arrived!

Dalia: w w9lna!

Jawa: yala ashel elshay ely 3alla 3aaine??

Awrad: Laaa, kane yaya!

She came in the back seat w nzltnee! Mshaina shwy! We stopped then!

Jawa: AAAHHHHH A7BKMMMM

dalia removed the aye thingy and we was in front of HILTONN!


They was holding bags so eb ng3aaaaad mneeee! I hugged them tightly..they are the best friends amd cousins ever♡♡♡

 Dalia/jawa: haa shraych?

Jawa: a7bkmmmm! Yaalaa lets go!!

We checked in and wore our swimming suits! And I couldn't stop smiling!!

We swam, got tanned, played beach volleyball and football! WE HAD FUN!

the sun was down, so we went to dry up and come back!

Jawa: wanasaa jad! 9bghna!,

awrad: eee chna asbanyat

Dalia: mayth7k asbanyat...?

Jawa: ely shsma cham youm eb ng3ad!?

Awrad: 3 days! Jawa: jad wanaaasa!

We cleaned up, and wore o clothes! And ate at pizza express, t3rfun elza7ma right? I dont have to describe:)::

We sat outside and ordered...

While talking. .

Khaled: haa sh3ndkm eb hiltonn?;p

He is one of my cousins, but not second y3ne he is a first class cousin;p ,I turned to see dalia's face and it was like this:

As you know, dalia was khaled love of life, he used to love when he was in 7 grade, she loves him too, but it was something she always denay..





Dalia wouldn't ever talk to a guy, we all have this concept "elsm3a ahm shay, w eltheqa mn ahlna aham" so  yes once again its restrained love..    

Jawa: 3ed miladi w m7tflen, yaw 7jzule mne! Shft shlun ana muhma w y7bune=))

I held my laugh 3ala dalia's face w awrad did! I gave awrad a devilish smile and..            

Jawa: dalia laish wayhch a7mar?

She gave me a death stare and: amm 7ar shfech enty?

Khaled laughed: enzain wain khalaty khnslm?

Jawa: yayen bru7na!

Khaled: na3am? Jawa: shd3wa tra masafrna!

Khaled: derbalkm shufaw elm9khra ely mne!

W he was looking at dallia, w dalia tswe nafsha tchuf elmenu::

Jawa: ok yala bye! Roou7!

Khaled: mu kafo, derbalkm!  M3a elsalama!

He went to his friends table w recognised some of my cousins also!, kant 6awlthm yam ely yamna!                          
                                             
Awrad: jawa fe wa7d eb 6awlat wld khatlch, ga3 ykhz 7ail! Khngum ma7b che!                                    

Jawa: malch shghel feh la t6al3en! We were talking and eating when!

Khaled shouting: MA TST7EEE ENTT??????

CHAPTER34

It was abdullah.

Jawa: ahlan abdullah shlunnk?

I thought actually I hoped that it was bader, and since they are brother amd have same voice.. I just expected for a second that its bader, but of course not.
                         
Abdulah: zain el7mdlah, ha sh3ndch ga3da bru7ch?

Jawa: la walla yaya ma3a dalia bas ra7t el7mam.

Abdulah: 3yal ana yay ma3a alahal, t3aly salmay?

Jawa: yalaa okay.

He was smiling and gesturing me toward their table.. I couldnt hold the smile and the excited expressions that covered my face..

I hope it wasn't that obvious. .

Jawa: ahlan hala bader,zaina el7mdlah.

Bader: ha maa taklen wyana

Anwar: glnalaha mu rathya, 7thrtha rfejtha na6rthaa::

3ade 3ade, la tstghrbun!! myana :p

Bader: oh bl3afya, nchufch 3yal!

Jawa: enshala ma3a elsalama!

...

I went back to our table with the biggest smile ever and knowing that awrad's will kill me because my phone My heart was beating really hard, ahal? Maybe bader is there! Yes yes im that desperate to see him! Its been a while. ..

Abdulah's mother: hala eb jawa hala walla

Bader wasnt there...

Jawa faking a smile: hala khalty hala walaa

Anwar: hala eb juju:p

Jawa ahlan ahlan

Salamat w chthe, 7anechaw ena ag3ad m3ahum bas I excused my self couse awrad is waiting, I turned around after saying goodbye, and before I walk

Bader: oh hala jawaa! I couldnt hold the smile and the excited expressions that covered my face..

I hope it wasn't that obvious. .

Jawa: ahlan hala bader,zaina el7mdlah.

Bader: ha maa taklen wyana

Anwar: glnalaha mu rathya, 7thrtha rfejtha na6rthaa::

3ade 3ade, la tstghrbun!! myana :p

Bader: oh bl3afya, nchufch 3yal!

Jawa: enshala ma3a elsalama!

...

I went back to our table with the biggest smile ever and knowing that awrad's will kill me because my phone Was viberating all the time w knt m6nshaa, I know it's awrad and she is going to kill me because she is looking for me..

I sat in the table..

Awrad: wainch wainchh enty?

Jawa: hehe slmt abdulah zouj ghezlan w ahla w che

Awrad: w che w bader??

Jawa *trying to hold my smile: eeh? Khala9 chub::

We ordered and talked then we went back home..

I kept thinking of bader and what happened today, his smile♡... I opened my ayes after along sleep, I  smiled widely for what happened yesterday! And also because tommorow is..MY BIRTHDAY! and im turning 18 finally!

I opened my phone and I found mentions in instgram twitter wassap and yeah, I forgot to mention that I closed my ask before maybe 6 months!I have a new rule, I choose who I talked to and I decide who talk to me, but talking to anonymous people not knowing who they are orcwhat did they want? No. Its my opinion actually;p

Anyway it was all like *tonight beautiful* *الليلة يا عمري تناديك الاحلام*

But a whatsapp message cought my eyes..

Elyoum enty 3ndna okay, we will Celebrate your birthday, adre bacher you will busy with your friends and family bas elyoum 7ajzench, ra7 tyen qa9ban 3laich! See you;*

It was from anwar, abdullah and bader sister! Will bader be there? I will see him? I wish..

While thinking ghezlan dar3mat my room...

ghezlan: OMG twna r7na elraya, 7jzna elqa3a! W designer byye next week! W swalf elcaturing  7jzth'ha omi! Bga the white dress, *started shouting* MY WEDDING BUGALA SHAHAR! I CANT BELIEVE IT!!!!!

Jawa: ay ay athouni, mat3rfun tg3dune w takhthune wyakm? W tra athkrch bacher 3ed miladi!:)
                                           
Ghezlan: thelfay!shswelch! 3ad anwar Thkrtne galt elyoum nru7 lhm me and you 3shan your birthday, ya7lailha! Fktna l2na maly khlg aswelch shay!

Nzlt t7t w smlt 3alla ahle w tghdena w g3dna w soulfna! Its now the time to get ready! First I waved my hair and polished my nail with mat electic blue colour! And wore this:

I went down stairs..

Dad: shhal zain! Sh7lat bnty kbrt shaikhat lbnat!

I blushed and hugged him.. Ghezlan came..

Ghezlan: ha ashkra gam tm9l7ain!

Jawa: ghezlan fleha:)::

Ghezlan: yala yuba mashen e7na!

Dad: eb 7fth elra7man!

We rode ghezlan's 1 door tented smock silver with red interior Mercedes E- class..     

And hit the rode, we arrived and I was really scared and nervous!

9efa6na w nezlna.. dshaina..

There was baloons w cake.. anwar abdulah his mother father w there cousins was there!

Whywhywhywhy. Klman mwjud ela Bass ras oma w obouh, so ekyouttt♡ enshala ma atn7 enshala! Mskt telfone baas makan fe sha7an! Atmana ma7ad yla7th, nzlt rassi w swait nafsi mndmja...

Bader: kl3am w enty eb khair jawa, laish maska telffonch w ehwa m9kar? Jawa: w ent eb khair, lol la bas gam anthf elshasha::

Bader: aaah ok::

W ra7 g3ad 3al qnafa! I want to glue my eyes so the dont follow him!

Then they started singing happy birthday w I was blushing and smiling all the time...I made a wish and prayed that god would answer that! And I blow the candles! They cheered w we cut the cake and we really had fun...

We thanked them and we were about to go but...

Abdulla's mother: 7ajya wain ray7a? Matben ur gifts?

Jawa: matg9ren khalty laish klftaw nfskm Ghezlan: ee walla khalty jawa mu kaffo!

I gave her a stare and laughed

Abdula's mother: yuzay 3anha ghezlan, la klafa walla shay!

We sat w they gave me the gifts! Bader left...

Abdulah's  mother gave me a prada bag, and abdulah gave me juicy bag and 3ammi gave me debenhams bag and finally anwar gave me a coloured  large bag w kan dakhlha small bag! 

I kissed their head w I thanked them w I hugged anwar slmna 3laihm w wd3nahm and we left! 

Rdaina elbait, klman naym! I went to my room and I was bored so I started Opening the gifts, the prada cross was amazing and all the other gifts! Anwar gift was amazing! Kan kla stuff mn victoria secret  w kan fe tiffany small bag!  I didnt opened it 3ala 6oul dshait 3laiha! 

Jawa: thankyou anwar jad laish klfty 3ala nfsch makan la da3i tifanny kafi ely swaitloya ilove u jad♡

Anwar: lat9rene mleqa tstahlen akthar bas ma ybt tifanny!

Anwar: eeeh hathe hadyat bader!

I read the word bader and I freezed, I threw the phone and went to the bag and opened it.. it was gold key with diamond in the middle, I smiled widly and my heart was beating so hard...  6l3t the necklace walla wrga t6e7  mn elbox !!....

CHAPTER33

It was fahad.

 For a minute, sorry a second I had some hopes.. Just a little ones..I thought maybe it could be bader, but no.. That exactly when I knew that ambition is pricless... Wait a minute? FAHAD!! My cousin? But but? Awrad? He is my brother from another mother! HOW? I'm lost.. That's when..

Jawa: ha?

Fahad and awrad: KAAAK 9ADOOO! phew..jad! ABAY

7ADHUM 7MEER the phone was on speacker so both of them were speaking..


Awrad: KAK jad fahad fkrtk naaarr a7s'haa en9dmt=))

Jawa: thelfaw thelfaw! A9lan knt gam abdl mmasm3t! Bas mrduda 7aghum both!

 Fahad: derbalch awrad ena kyduha 3athem =))

We stayed 2 days In the chalet and went back home at night! It was great and fun! As the usual.. But I was expecting bader to come..even for an hour! Half hour! Anything, I just want to see him, to see his face features and smile! I dont want more..I swear, I went            to awrad's home directly from chalet ..I felt awrads shaking my hands

Jawa: ha, h,a ha shtben!??

Awrad: mu kafoo knt bas2lch tben starbucks:)!

Jawa: La mabe khl9ena! We went home, slmt 3alla khalty w 3ame! G3dna shway w r7na darha, I layed on the bed..

Jawa: awrad enty tdren ena fahad y7bch?  So from her red face I can see that he told her and she loves him too LOL!

Jawa: w t7bena enty. Awrad: 3ade y3nee! Y3ne ee y3ne like cousins che Jawa: ana yeje mn bangal..

Awrad: ghayray elmwthu3! Jawa*laughing*:  sta7att sta7at sta7at:::

Awrad: chub:::

We kept few minutes silent scrolling in our twitter's timeline then...

Awrad: jawa bgoul shay..      

While giving most of my attention to my phone..

Jawa: ha

Awrad: umm.. bader, ahh shlounah?

Jawa: mayth7k! Shdrane-.-

Awrad: yklm rfejty...

Honestly I wasnt really shocked but I was down,I will try to act like I dont care..but who we are kidding! All of you Know that I do, and will always do.

Jawa*still looking at the screen and not caring*:  adre -.-

I know that awrad knows that I dont know, and I just find out from her! But I know she will not bring it up cause if I did that, it means I really really dont wanna talk about

...

I opened my eyes in the morning, actually it was 1pm but it was my morning LOL! and Since its summer! I mean June, five days left for my birthday! And I will finally TURN18! And I will drive my amazing car whenever I want with who I want and wherever I want!..

So today my brother khaled ia taking me to some bra7a to practice, I started Driving since I was 16, but khaled 7anach ena asoug feh w he test me y3ne chna 9j:::!

I was excited because I will not only drive in bra7a, I will drive in the street! I opened my twitter while I was still in my bed and scrolled through the timeline, my eys cought an tweet...
                                                               
                                                             
@breakingkw : كويت/ حادث يؤدي الى موت  شاب#  

Okayyyy:), thats a cheering thing to read in a morning:)!

I always wanted to drive and been obsessed with cars but now? Im scared and im having secong options, bala da3mt w met? Bala d3mt a7ad w mat? Bala rakba wya a7ad w dm3t w matw?...Know that I do, and will always do. Jawa*still looking at the screen and not caring*:  adre -.-

I know that awrad knows that I dont know, and I just find out from her! But I know she will not bring it up cause if I did that, it means I really really dont wanna talk about

...

I opened my eyes in the morning, actually it was 1pm but it was my morning LOL! and Since its summer! I mean June, five days left for my birthday! And I will finally TURN18! And I will drive my amazing car whenever I want with who I want and wherever I want!..

So today my brother khaled ia taking me to some bra7a to practice, I started I dont know what to do but I know one thing, I will not tell my parents anything:)! Ok ok I will do it I can!

I got up from my bed went to the bathroom did my business, prayed the estekhara thingy and I called dalia..*my cousin*

Jawa: daliaaaaa

Dalia: shtben?

Jawa: tkhyly 9lait 9alat estekhara ena awal mara a9le bas ena d3ait ena elyoum bsoug blshare3 w 9ayr 7adeth w wa7d mat w galbi naqzne bas ra7 arou7 law shnu bas khayfa!

Dalia: shtben y3ne?

Jawa: daliaaaaa:')

Dalia: sm3ay jawa ely alah katba b9er W elyoum ely btmuten feh ra7 eyy w 7ag ay a7ad, maala shghel enty tsugen wala enshala eb baitkum! La tkhafen w twklay 3ala alah! W enty mu awal wa7da etsug y3ne, kanne ana sh7latii sgt w adous ba3ad, magoulch ena 9a7, bas ena..fhmty 9a7? Yala thelfay.

W sadeta.. typical dalia, im used to it:: but her words as always was meaningful and I felt ready to go..

I went down stairs and I saw my brother khaled, he was talking to his boss on the phone, so asharrle ena rou7ay badlay bnru7 al7ien, ashrtla ena you3ana, asharle ena nmr mac w e7na ray7en:::, I know weirdos LOL!

I went up stairs and I wore high waist leggings, with gray blazer and tifanny sneakers, my tifanny *key* silver nickless and I was ready to go.. I went down stairs w khaled was waiting...

Khaled: yala mshena?

Jawa: yalla!

We rode MY car, but he was driving..we went to mac drive through and I ordered macchicken  with cheese *my favourite* w I started eating and khaled began to give me some tips and how shoulf I drive and etc..

W9lna bara7a w nzal 3shan arkb the driver's seat, I was nervous..

Khaled: nafs ma3lmtch jawa, derbalch

I started driving while repeating, bsmlah..I did in the bra7a great, but now? We are talking real business.

Nzalt 3al share3 w nafs elshay I did Great...

Khaled: khush shay:p! Tra emta7nch mal el driving 7th june!

Jawa: waanaassaaaa!

..

We went home and I called awrad and told her, 7adha eshta6at!
                                               
Awrad: enzain sh3ndch lyoum?

Jawa: mako

Awrad: khal ne6la3?

Jawa: maly khlg

Awrad: yala kane bl6rej

W tsda:), shfehum elnas 3lay elyoum? Anyway..I asked my parents then Changed my clothes to those I wore earlier today, has some touch ups w I I finished just in time...

Phone call:

Awrad: yala 6l3ay *hangs up*

La jad, fe shay 3ala salfat tsded eltlfonat eb wayhe:):::


We went to slider station...

We waited 45 minutes, after that we sat in our table, started talking and ordered. .

Awrad: dgega brou7 7mam

Jawa: zain

She went and I started scrolling in my Timeline w talking dalia w told her what happened earlier thats when..

....: hala jawa shlunch?

CHAPTER32

I screamed from my lungs that everyobody starti laughing,but strangers didnt, they were staring at me like a crazy! ohh little they know;p!

Jawa: OMGOMG, TONIGHT ISS GREAAATTT!
                             
Mom: derbalch jawa, law am7tay may7taj aw9e ok? W slaiman drbalkm jawa lel7ien ma3ndha lysin!

Slaiman: la t7aten yala ma3aalsalama!


So yeah my brother was driving my car when he told us earlier that he will follow us with his own car!!

I saw the car and I ran to it, I heard my brother's laughes behind but itcwas blurry! All I can think about ia that babe!!!! It so glosssy red♡ Of course like a psycho I teared,happy and excitement tears of course while hugging the car, WALA MAGAM AFLEM IT FEELS GREAAAAAAAAAATTTT,  un-describable!

Slaiman: zain matben tdshen? *laughing*

Jawa: my god, 36ne elkeys::

Omg the smell♡, 3rftuha re7at elkshn elyded? LOL!                        

We drove tell home and the was more than amazing...


That night, I didnt slept..yes because im happy for graduation..and the car! But..

I miss him, its been along time since I heard his voice or seen his face.. I know his not mine, I know he doesnt love me but I love him! I have this passion for him and I just can't let it go...I love every thought that is passed about him, I wish...I wish..


 ....


I woke up it was 1 pm...after cleaning up I went downstairs..my father and mother was there. .

Dad: hala hala eb khrejtna *smiles*

Mom: 9a7 elnoum ya 7elwaa

A smile stretched on my face, I kissed there forhead and..

Jawa: you3anaaaaaa:(!

Mom: rou7ay elm6bakh w b6lay Elthalaja w shufay shnu akoo..
                               
I went to the fridge,opened it and I found a paper, it was folded..

Curiosity got the best of me as always, I opened the paper it was..
                                     
MY REPORTCARDDDD!    


Searching for the degree searching for my degree that has the power of my my future!...omgomg yarab yarab!!...



94%

7MDLAH YARAB♡ sjaddt sajdat shukr and I went to the living room carrying the paper and screaming!!

Jawa: YBT 94 YBT 94!!! Dad: nadre yuba matshufen 6rshnach elthalaja*hugs* thats my girl!

Mom: mbrokkk 3saa rabe ywfgch hathe elsn33aaa! *hugs*


Today.. tell now is great!

I went out with awrad! We went to 360! Had lunch at b+f After long waiting and did some shopping.. *phone call*:

Dad: ha jawa mstansa?

Jawa: ee wayd, ha sh3ndk?

Dad: dam awrad ely 6al3a wyach, al7ien omch tklm omha t3alw al7ien 3shan nrou7 elshalih!

Jawa: 9ej!!! Wanasa yala bye!.

.. Jawa: yala yala khnrd!

Awrad: mstansa 3shan bnrd  elbait?-.-mretha 7bebty?-.-

Jawa: chub!! Bnru7 elshaleh! Omi btklm omch!!!!

Awrad: chathaba abay khanrddd!

..


We went back home, packed our bags and hit the road with my brother and   and aabdulah,  ghezlan's husband;p..my other brother is behind us in another car with my father and mother!


The ride was amazing, bas 3ba6 w 9rakh w aghane! Jawa: khanmerr starbucksss!

Abdullah: yaala w nmr starbucks.. manrd khrejatna

Jawa: hheehe:$

Awrad: 6b3an ana 6anbur6en mne, shaaadtne t6la3 ela7d a9lan 3ade:)    

Ghezlan: LOL yebay shhadtch b3den ntfahm::

..

Mrena satrbucks w r7na elshaleh! All my cousins are there w klman!but unfortunately not bader...

I saw fahad comming toward us..

Fahad: mbrok khrejatna!

Awrad: abay 7ta ana tkhrjt:) Fahad: adre gam aklmch ana::

Awrad wayha galab a7mar, I left those two love birds:p!

R7t w slmt w klaina! Kanw mshwen w loya w wansaa! Le elfayer! 7ztha klman ra7 w nam 3shan nanzl ba7ar bacher..

I went upstairs w madre wain awrad, I called her her phone os switched off!
I called 3 times but the third time when I closed the phone, it rang! 7mdlah I was worried about her!. I answered quickly!

I was about to shout but...

...: jawa a7bch





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CHAPTER31

Jawa: sh-shako bkaifk ent shnu aklma wain ga3den enta heyw tra ana mtrbya ok enta matfham ok y3ne shhal 7ache!

I got so angry from what he said, I  loved someone and I held the pain..he offered his love even if he wasnt honest and I know he wasnt but I could've easily talked to him but I didnt because I wasn't raised that way! And fahad say that? I thought he used to trust me..

Fahad: jawa..!

Jawa:  mahgaitk tshk!

Fahad *3la 9outa shwaya*: y3ne lma ashouf bnt 3amme tetwatar lma hatha bader eeyy w yl3ab ma3aha bru7ha w rdaity 3alay eb esma w 7ta lma awrad galtlch wain 7beb elglb. ..tra mbyn qa9dkm 3anna!jawaaa laishhh enty mu che mahgaitch! I cried from my heart! Even though I didnt do anything wrong but...I cried

Fahad shwy hedda w he  took a deep breath and let it out...
                                             
Jawa *screaming while crying*: a7ba a7ba w mage9 3laik! Bas akher shay asswwee eb 7yaty aklmm 9bay! Tchufne ana trbait 3ala chthi? Ana  7baitaa eb galbi w thats it!


I cried more w 7thaft telfonii 3laih!

Jawa: m-mu ma ttheq! Yala check!
                                                               
And More crying..! Fahad kan mnzl    rasa! He was feeling guilty I know him! A7saan! I kept crying in my place...

He was about to walk away.. no thats not fahad! Maysweha...must7el he   watch my crying and walk away... It like he read my mind...

He came back and hugged me..

Fahad: asf jawa?tadren ena ana atheq fech 7ail bas y3ne ham fhmene..nadetene eb esma! Y3ne Sam7ene. ..

Jawa: o-okk
                                                       
I stopped crying and..          

Jawa: goodnight

Fahad: t9b7en 3ala khair tgh6ayy 3adel!

I went to my room and awrad was sleeping, thanks god because I was so tired from all the crying. .I wasn't in the mood  to tell her

I looked in the mirror to see my face.. LOL my noise look like a clown's noise!!                                                  

I laughed..I went to the bathroom, washed my face, prayed and went to bed...

I was over thinking...I miss bader and his smile.. I was worrying about fahad, will he treat me the same?

.....

Its been weeks ..months...and I haven't
Heard of bader! And the problem is that I didn't love him less, only more!

Ugh god, it's its painful. ..

When will it stop? When when when...

....

Its the last exam, cant believe it. ..im Finishing grade12? No more school? Thats greaaaattttt♡♡♡♡♡♡ but I will miss it, even though I dont talk much about it! But I will miss it! I love when I walk everywhere and everybody know me, I loved the time I spent with my class, n7shat w sh6aanaaa! Its just great♡ cant believe it♡

....

The exam was so easy! After that salaamt 3ala kl elmadrsaaaa w loyaaa w aghlab bnat 12 qrrna nrou7 ntrygg:p


We had so much fun jaaad!..7flat eltkhrj kant eb nafs lyoum! Eb missoni...

I went back home walaa kl ahlee w my cousins mwjuden! Kanw mswen yam3a bmunasbt tkhrjee w mara wa7da klna nru7 el7fla, yes kl ahle Byun;p!...so

Uncle jassem: mabrokkkk yal khrejaaa! Muhandstna enshalaaaa!    

My auntie shatha: shlch eb 3war elras ya rabiii! Ekhthay businesses w fkkaay 3umrch w twathfay eb  shrkat obouch!

Me*laughing*: la ana a9er mundsa b3den ymskne elshreka eb kbrhaa=))

Khaled my brother: w ana 6ambor6en mne? Ana amsk elshrka akhlech skrtera enty=))

Slaiman: lala ana b9er, bas la t7atun bkhlekm mudeerenn=))

Ghezlan: ana bamska elshrka w ma7ad eb yshtghel, 3abadlah yamsk elshghl

Abdullah: yaztle elfkra Dad: afaaa 3abdlah 9fait wyaahum? Tdrun shlun mane emskha a7ad=))

....

We had lunch w swalf w loyaaa, yat awrad w she helped to get ready!

I wore white peplum dress, swait sha3re stright slicked ponytail w farg, with wavy ends! And for the make up, I made the thick aye cat ayeliner shape, with D&G mat fire red lipstick and coats of mascara, and silver nail polish! I looked great!!    


Awrad:yala yala yala! Elrob 76aita blsyara! Ana wyach bnru7 wya elsayg  w elbaji 3ala 3adadm shklm byun eb   bas =)) Jawa: ya 7the kl nas eb syara=))
...  

Jawa alx                            

I walked to the stage and i was stressed! Khthait elder3 w 9wrune with my mother and father..

Elensana ely tqdm elf7la: jawa 3ndch klma t7ben Tgoulennha eb hal munasba el7elwa?

Omggg chan 36une speach mn gbl!! Shdraaaaaneeeee shgoull! Glna a3rf at7cha bs mn wain ayeb klaaaam??

I smiled in a facking way: hehe aked.

Daaamn shgoul!

Jawa: 6ab3an awwal shay a7b ashkr omi w obouy 3ala hal trbya el7elwa, l2na bdunhm magdrt atfwqqq w Anjaa7! Thane shay a7b ashkr elmdrsa w elmdrsat, mag9araw ma3ana w 9a7 elmeethal la galw elmudrsa om elmehan! L2na elabla tkhej mudrsa muhndsa w 6beba w emr2at a3mal w jeel tftkher feh dertna, w elmdrsa nafs'ha mshat ma3ana eb kl kh6wa w wthfat lna kl elwsa2ul ely khlt elt3lem shay yn7ab,, w akheran zamelati ely enjm3t wyahym eb kl elmra7el, mara7 ansakm w enshala ywfgkum ajma3en w slamatkm.. Omg mn wain 6la3 el7ache? It was great! Omg they are cheering loudly, hehe wanasa:::

3ala akher el7fla slamt 3ala kl rfejaty w 9wrna w wz3na kakaw w 9wrt wyaa ahle w kan wanasa...


After that bnru7 nt3asha ana w ahle eb nino...

Slaiman: yalla ana la7gom eb syara thanya

Jawa: laish haw?

Slaiman: l2na b3den b6l3 seda wyaa rab3i male khlg arja3 elbait

Jawa: okay!

.... At nino..

Dad: hathee hadetch jawa, tstahlen akthar baba..

It was a tifanny bag,  ahle klhm ga3den y6al3une w mbtsben ashkalhm yth7k!

I kissed my father's forhead and sat in my place...

Khaled my bro: jawa shnu elhdya matben tb6lenha?

Jawa: abay 3adde? Okok ka bb6lha::!

I opened the bag w there was a small tifanny box, I opened  the box to find. .

Jawa: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

...



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CHAPTER30

I had a goosebump and I knew that he noticed...
       
Bader: fech tl3ben korra? Zahga!

Akh ya glbi. Wait wait msa3 7ta mabarkle w al7ien? Ugh. Bas waaay:(::
                                                         
Jawa: aaaah, obouy mayrtha. Mt9erle mn greb 7ta..                                    
                                                               
Shkhrb6t:"(?                                    
                                                 
Bader laughed. .haw?                          
I stood staring and waiting for him to speak. .
                                                           
Bader: obouch ehwa ely gale a6la3     el3ab ma3ach

AHA. jad baba? JAAD? shswe I cant play I will maybe die.. I almost fell in a coma when he called my name!what if I played football with him, im not over Re acting but its like a dream...He noticed that I was speachless w mtn7a..

Bader: mu lazm asasn 7sbale enty eb tl3ben.
                                                             
Kan mnzl rasaa..omg:(!.. I guess he was about to leave but he is waiting an answer. .                                    

Jawa: la 3addi ana wde al3ab bas madre ah y3ne ok yala 36ne pass..

Rf3at sha3re into a bun bsr3a..
                                                   
He smiled: wait  shnu eb nl3ab?

Jawa: mmmadrre kaifk bas mu balantyat...  
                       
Bader: laish?

Can. He. Please.  Stop. Smiling. Jawa: ma3rf 3adel ashhot bas lma al3ab ena hjum akun greba fa 3adi, bas elt3di my game. .

Shloun glt che:')?

Bader: yala t3dii

Jawa: yala...

We started playing w knt khayfa 7ail agrb.. knt shwy mtybsa bas later bada3t.. he was impressed and I was afraid...my face was funny, I wish these mommets  would last forever.. he was playing with a smile but I kept focused and kept my ayes on the ball...I played professionally in a girly way..it was unique. .

Jawa: bas khala9 t3bt, t3adul! Not bad

Lel7ien ma tbsmt wala ne9 ebtsama 7ta... Bader laughing: ya mama knt mabe a3wrch wala chan shalakhtch
         
Its true actually, he was playing carefully...lalala don't laugh lalalaalalal

Bader: shfech maska tha7ktch, 3adi el7ya 7elwa=))

Finally I laughed. ..3al khfef:'(

Jawa: aha y9er khair. .anyway gn

He flashed a smile and I left, no its not romeo and Juliet.. hey didnt call me.. he didn't call me and I answered....I was openning the chalets door thats when...

bader: JAWAA

how can a simple word, sorry I mean my name sounds different in his voice, just calling my name? Made my heart Rythem flow♡.. I held my smile and turned around to see what he wanted..

Bader: bacher etha fathya a3lmch tchuten balantyat;p

Jawa: mashe *smiles*

I went to my room and layed in my bed...                                                  


Awrad: 3sa mashar shaga eltha7ka?

Jawa: kaife bth7aak:)::

Awrad: ee zain y9er khair.

After few minutes I collected every piece of my guts and spilled it..

Jawa: l3bna koraa

Awrad: shswelch y3ne? Kla tl3ben kora Whats new?

Jawa: wyaa bader:)

Awrad: 7elfaaaay abaayyy kaaaakkkk:: gtlch y7bch!

39bt aw tnrrfzt aw st7ait madre sh9ar blthab6..

Jawa: shako shako eb kaifch? Thfaaay

I took my phone and went to the bathroom to take a cold blessing bath..

......

Next day..

Awrad: goumaayy goumaayy goummaayy yala bn6eebbbb!!

Jawa: uhhh enzaaain! Awrad was ready! I went to the bathroom.. did my business.. after that I prayed and I wore

The black shorts with the top and the purple bikiny and awrad the  wore short with the tank top and floral bikiny *pictures are in the end of the post*



My hair was naturally curly and awrad pulled her hair into a bun..


Nzlna Elchalets fathe klmann ga3d 3al ba7ar! We went outside to see everyone!

Khalaty w 3amami w 3amaty w ahle 7a6en 6wlat w yshrbun chay w cake w swalf w el9byan korraa w elbnat jetat w ely ysba7 w tan w ely y9wr w elly bagyyyy! Jad kan elveiw 3ajeeeb♡♡

R7t slmt 3laihumm.. 7nait 3laa awrad tl3ab ma3ay korra!..

Jawa: Pleeeeeeeease:(!!

Awrad: zain thlfay!

R7na w l3bna w knt mu 7asa nafsi a9arkh w slitat w chna 9ej..
   
Akh khla9 elgame w b3dha 6bena! W n9wr w nakel w nsabggg le elsa3a 7! Ba3adha klman tsb7 w nzal...

Jawa: alaaahh ashm re7at shaweee! Awrad: mukhch en ba6nch:) hatha 7ada!

Nzlna ta7at walla...

Khaled: lay6uffkmmmm gam yshwun gbaageebb!!

Awrad: way3a khaled!

He laughed and walked away..but came back and asked...

Khaled: ella wain dalia?

Me and awrad looked at each other elnathra elyy *kaaaaak*

Jawa and awrad: ohhhhhh m3jb mmghrmm =)) *dancing*

Khaled: shhal hbaal shako=))

Jawa: shouf wayhk bs shlun mn9fg=)) And awrad raise her phone infront of his face and opening the front camera and we teared from laughing=)) 7dna sakhefen=))

He left us while giving us crazy        stares... we was sat on the stairs..
             
Awrad: ela wain 7beb glbch mma byn elyoum?      

Fahad: mnu 7beb glbha?

He was going down and heared us! Shgoul shgoul!! Wayhe mbyn mn9dm! I was speachless...

Awrad *faking laugh*: ahahahah 3mrk mlyon qa9di 3nk mnu ba3ad. .kl mashufkm wyaa b3th ahhah=))

W ana lel7ien sakta.. 6gtne awrad ena t7chay! Jawa: shft shloun fahad kak 7a9lk y9er 7beb glbi ru7 mout ahh ah gbageb bara=)) t3al t3al=))

Ymkn 6wfha w ma dqaq feha l2na 7bebat glba mne *awrad* fa 6af:::

Fahad: yala;p

Me fahad and awrad started walking on the beach 3la maykhl9un elakal..

We was talking w ma3a elswalf gamw ysulffun w ana skat, 9a7 klam awrad? Wain bader? Wain ely ybe y3lmne ashot balanyat? Waina?..

...: jawa jawa jawa jawa

I was daydreaming and thinking so..

Jawa: hala bade-- fahad qa9di! Omg lallalalaa!

Fahad wgaf w ga3 y6al3ne ely mn9dm!

Fahad:shhglty?

Jawa: sh-ssglt? Ma glt shay shfek!

Fahad: aha ok, ee kamlay awrad!

Fahad mbyn ena m39b..daamnnnn ! W gal 7ag awrad kmlay 3shan tthe3 elsalfa! Omg what ive done! We went back and ate! I was the hall time silent..9ej kan ym3a w wanasa bas knt khayfa w mu gadra a76 3aine eb 3ain fahad!

Khl9aw klman dash w nam...ana gam awde l97un!
                                                             
Awrad: ana an6rch foug daykha!

Jawa: khala9 ok!

I was alone collecting the plates and singing. .

Suddenly. .

....: jawa?

I jumped from my place!

Jawa: fahad abay khr3rtne...

Knt gma a7awl a9d 3ana w aym3 L97un!
 
Fahad: tklmen bader enty?

....

CHAPTER29

She cried, I laughed and I walked away...everything was normal in the class, the day passed by normally! I went home..                            

I smiled just for seeing my father and mother, im so glad having pure hearted people in my life♡, we had lunch and I went to my room.

I prayed! D3ait rabbi da3wa w alah yktb ely feh khair , d3ait ena alah yhde bader w ywfga! D3ait rabbi eba yb3ed 3na kl mkroh, d3ait rabbi ena y7bni! Mabe aklma mabe shay. Bas I want his love...

I did my homeworks and I called          awrad, its been a while since I saw her, Ive been so nitm for anyone lately...

We talked for few hours and I went to sleep..                                  
                                                 This week passed by quickly.. it is weekend, me and awrad and sara are going to 360! I know my mother wont mind! Actually she will be happy! Couse lately klsh magam a6la3!
   
I wore black short sleeves peplum with dark skinny jeans and foshya tory burch flats and bag..

We met there at CR..

Jawa: ahlan...
     
Sara and awrad: mabghetay:)!
       
We went to a movie, JIO! it was great!
After that we went directly to b+f! Ma7b atmsha eb 360 thursday, so crowded.

We waited 45 minutes and our table was ready...

They was talking about something that I wasnt listening to...
     
Awrad: jawa klsh mu 3ajbtne! Madre shfeha! 7ta shufay magam tsm3na!

Sara: ee 7ta blmdrsa kla mtn7a w swalfha mu nafs gbl..

Awrad: I think it's bader

Sara: I do too. ..

Sm3t shay sm3t shay glbi y7ba... Fzait!

Jawa: shnu???

Awrad and sara had an aye contact and I was there like a dommy..
                                                             
Sara: awrad spill it, shsalftch klsh mu  3alla ba3thch? La tgoulin wala shay! Jawa: shswe y3ne 9j mafe shay??
       
Well actually there is something, but what to do? What to say?

Awrad: jawa we know its bader

Wayhe engalab!, its true bas shgoul I dont know how to deal with this?

Faking a laugh nervously: KAAKK la shako..yala bsr3a 6lbaw yu3ana!

6lbaw we ate, they talked I pretend to listen but I was in a another place, a place with happiness a place with bader...the heart owner!  You know, owners never leave:p...

Weeks passed, its my last year! Shada 7ailee but about my life? The life out of school? Was dead! And I hated it..I dont know what is the hell wrong with Me...
 
Finally its aid aladha, we usually go  to the chalet, from the first day at night  we stay there for 10 days and come back...I really miss the beach football awrad 'the 39aba' my cousins ajwa2 elchalets, I really need that...

So its 3arafa, we are fasting... so me ghezlan and awrad have a tradition for this day..we eat at ashaz in the marina
Then we do our nails at N-bar, then we go to salmya sultan center, buy the morning cake supplies! Then go home bake thim take a bath, awrad goes to her home and we sleep!                                                                
  الله اكبر الله اكبر الله اكبر لا اله الا الله الله اكبر الله اكبر ولله الحمد...                                            


Mama: ghezlann jawaa yala goumay yala la tw6fun ryoug el3eeddd... Ahhhh a7b ajwaa2 el3eed♡♥

I went to the bathroom and did my business, I always go first before ghezlan, she is lazy!:: I went to the dinning room to find my hall family eating the breakfast with smiles and wishes and 3eed music...

I kissed my father mother and brothers
With wishing them a happy 3eed. ..
     
I sat and ghezlan came holding the cake we made last night

Ghezlan: 9un3 edya w 7yat 3nyaaa

Father: uh uh khush shghel..

I was munching my food quickly so I can talk while ghezlan was kissing my mother father and brothers...

Jawa: *mumbling* Slaiman: ekaly eklay b3den t7chayyy ya hailgya

Jawa: chubb!! Baaabaa ehya ga3da t3dl athaferha mu 3ajebha ellun ely kant 7a6taaa w ana w awrad kna n6bakh

Dad while laughing: tslm eed awrad

Jawa: baaabaaaaaaaaa!!!

Mom: bask t7rsh eb bntk, tslm eedch mama elcake tynn

Khaled: tlw3 elchabd:)

And the chatter went on....        

Mom: yala bnat get ready..

Me and ghezlan got up to get ready. ..

I made my hair into big waves while Ghezlan made her hair straight and then swat farg blne9 with slick ponytail and wavy endings...

I wore my high west flow skirt with blue grean and yellow colors, with lase white top, and prada blue cross bag with blue tory burch flats. While ghzlan  wore CH white jaket with red lace skirt with her red D&G fire red lipstick..

We were ready, we went to our mother side  relatives and then went back home, to stay with our father side relatives and at night go to the chalet together. ...


So yup its night we are finally going to the chalet...

I changed into a white top with free city training took my bag and went to the car... me awrad dalia are going in Ghezlans car with her...the ride was amazing aghane w loyat banat w ghezlan khayfa mn el6rej w 9j wanasa! W9lna elchalet w klman ra7 dara 7a6 aghratha... me and awrad in one room...

Jawa: ahhh I missss

Awrad: 7aadaaaa

Jawa:Ana bnzl atmasha tyeen?

Awrad: la ru7ay!  

I took my headphones played my music and walked  on the beach, eljaw badi ytsn3 blail, the beautiful cold beeze is just amazing, I layed on the sand staring at the stars and thinking about my star, my superhero my love... he saved nothing but... he save my heart from dying. .. he is always there.... I woke up the next day, went to the bathroom wore my training 3dlt sha3re w nzlt ta7at, walla klman mwjud, even bader! Bghait arja3 foug bsr3a madre laish khft...chan fahad y9rkh JAWAAA

ya w lamneee chna mu shayfne mzmann 3ad 9j I miss him:"( ena ams ma g3dt wayd wyahun w haik::

Jawa: ahlan ahlan, bas 3ad 3an eltflem, ha mta bt6bun?

Hamad: ba3ad 9alat elthher

Jawa: mashe..., I had a quick glance to see bader, shfeh m39b hatha! Kan mtn7!, I passed him! I hoped that maybe he could wish me a happy 3aid, but no nothing! I sat down.. gam asoulf wya my cousin w m36eta thahre,but I felt him leaving the room... I want him!! dont leave dude:(Elmuhm swalf w loya w che...

Jawa: LOL EE,ellmuhm mnu yabe yl3ab kora 3ala may9er elthher w t6bun?

Shahen: l3bay 7reray b3den enyy nm9khrch bru7 elbqala e7na::::

Fahad: matben tyen?

Jawa: laa bl3ab kora w bn6r awrad tgoum

Abdulla: yaalaa byeeee

Jawa: bye yebule barbican!!
.....


I wore shorts and Chelsea jersey...rf3t sha3re w khthet elkora w 6l3t...

I started playing playing and playing.... ....: jawa

I heard that voice behind my back it made my heart ache  it made me die and leave again it made me smile, but of course I hid my smile and turn around. ..

Yes bader.

Jawa: hala ?

Bader:....


hope t

CHAPTER28

LOL why im not tearing? Maybe im not believing this? There is alot alot inside my heart, I was waiting to write this chapter to speak alll what inside my heart so here we go...

I love someone that im totally sure he doesnt love me back, he talk to girls I saw it in my own ayes in twitter...keeping this big painfull shit inside your heart? Is just too much, way too much! Im shy, I cant tell me friends even awrad or dalia or even sara, I cant! I have one friend in this case, tears! They react what I feel and they are so damn close, but they never stay just like every thing else, writing this helped me to get it of my heart, I have a broken heart with a big headen love inside for someone he doesnt even know, and that person happened to be a guy who talk to girls, and now I find out, he talks also to my classmate And her cousin,  and I have to act normal, maybe little shocked for what she said earlier, and I have to help her, god this is tough..

Nourra: shfech mtn7a! Laykun tklmena ba3ad?

Jawa: nourra m3nde hal swalf:/ bas hatha rfej cousin!

Nourra: w sh3rfch eb rfej ur cousin? Sshnu enty ahlch nou3hmm wayd free?

Jawa: Nourra shnu wayd free mala shghel, hath rfej my cousin mzman w 7ta yam shalehna kla eyy yslm 3ala ahle w yl3ab ma3ana korra

Nourra: aha!, shbtswen?

Jawa: wait! I didnt like nourra's attitude bas 6wft!..

Jawa: aloo hala fahad!

Fahad: hala jawa ha shbghety?

Jawa: umm esma3 chft rfejk bader? Tkhyl la3b 3ala rfejty w bnt khaltja  shsalfta hatha!

Everytime I say his name...

Fahad: ahh ya jawa  salfta salfa!  Madre shfeh  mn3fs hal youmain machna bader eltkana elhady el3agel, nfseta wa9la klsh 7ta nsait akher .ata chfta yth7ak, ythb6 banat yrqmhm w 7ta maybehm wla shay bs madre shfeh, gam ydkhn w kla madre wain alah ga6a!.. w derbalch mn hathe rfejtch, l2na ely gam ythb6hm jdama bl share3 wala shay che, y3ne bnat khfaf mayst7unnn! Fa derbalch w wkhray 3anha! Wayyy 7ram bader:( shfeh? Whats wrong.. I wish I could ask him in my mind. .. omg fahad, I forgot him!:::

Fahad: jaaaaawaaaaaa, m3ayy?

Jawa: eh asm3k shfeck! Mm elmuhm alah y3enah w lat7ate ehya khush bnt ma3laik!

Fahad: I warned u, take care loveu bye!

Jawa: love u 2, u2 bye!

Nourra gam t6al3ne w wyha mstghrb, I ignored male khlg! Mushkltha matg3ad wyaa her cousins aw madrun 3anha!

Jawa: my cousin galle ena ehwa gam ythb6 banat w ehwa asasn may7bhum bas mar en 7ala nfsya w ybe y6l3 7rta!

Noura: uhhh, im sure he will realise that im the one! Jawa: sure:)

Jawa mskay Nfsch, her phone rang:

Noura: ohhh badure is calling!

She put it in speaker and started talking, can anyone amagine how torturing is this:)? And her voice? Mta 9ar dlo3 che! Omg.

I tried to look busy playing in my phone bas as usual kan 6affi! So I looked at the black screen of my phone while mu ear is listening to her love phone call.

Bader kan  9outa klsh mu mt7ms aw shay, chna twa gaym mn elnoum! Twa gaym mn elnoum w dag 3laiha! I guess maybe she is the one?

Bader: yalah jaw mary ree ! Shsmch enty? Nour yala bye! When I heard the 'jaw' I felt something, like a spark of hope, thats sillly I know but when I heard him saying many names then I figured out that he have many girls that he mix between them! Uhh im stupid! And silly.

Nourra: ouhhh 7ada cute ma ast7ml!!

Jawa: -.- matklm kla gam tsulfen

Noura: eee ehwa kla ygouli soulfay!

Jawa: whatever, 36ene telfonch bdg 3al sayg telfone 6fa!

She had a blackberry, 7ztha kan cool!::
Elmuhm so ybyn etha u called or u received a call, anyway SHE called bader 3 times b3den he answered:), mumkn afham laish elchthb? WHYYY DID SHE LIED! Way3a ma7b 9aidat che shsalfatha hathe::, I called the driver and went home!                          Slmt 3laa ahlee and went to my room, I saw slaiman and khaled in my room playing ps3 fifa! I entered the room and threw my self in the bed

Slaiman: ghreba ma7netay abe al3ab::

Jawa: maly khlg a7sne mreee...

Slaiman: GOUULLLLLL QA9BAN 3ALA WAYHKKK YALA ETHLF E6LBLEE KFC

ah ok:)!

khaled: yal ghshashhh ent a9lan 7a6 khe6a ghalay w 7thkkk 9ar 7elw..

And they countied fighting,  tra etha nswetaw wa7d 3mra 28 w wa7d 23:)

I slept...


Mama: jawa yala gumayy! awa : mama a7sne mskhna! Mabe arou7!                        

My mother touched my forhead

Mama: chnch shwy 7wera, khala9 ghebay elyoum 3shan bacher 3ndch test, try7en shwy 3shan tdrsen!        

Jawa: ok gn


That day passed by normally, I woke up and I felt betr studied and bla bla bla....


Let's talk about the next day..

I went to school, I entered my class w klman gam y6al3ne!, r7t mkane w ama sakta! Nourra mghyra mkanha w         ga3da yam group banat! Ely no3hm gossip w omg w haik::: We had a class math so everybody was silent! But after that we had e7tya6, the girls started shaping in groups ans started talking, I wasn't nitm, so I put my head in the desk and tried sleeping but I could feel the girls gazing me, until I heard nourra say:

Eeeh wala hatha el buga tyye baitna 3shan tklm 99byan w takhth ra7tha!

Ok there is somethimg you need to know about me, ana ejtma3ya sha6ra elanlat y7bune, my l2ne wayyd mu2dba ! L2na ashark eb aghlb elansh6a w ham sh6anty mu el qelat adab, 7chara w l3b! W m3rufa ena 3nde eslub w theqa w a3rf at7cha bain elbanat w elablat, w must7el akhle 7agii!  But this time, 7grt w chne masm3t! Hathe  elnw3ya mn elbnat low! 9dmtne! After I helped her w g3dt wyaha w klshay tgoul che? Wlaa matst7e! La w ely ygoul ehya mskkta! Bas mara7 aswe salfa l2na mabe athawsh wyaha, hal nu3 mn elbanat ely lsanha w9kh w 3ade tg6 7ache! Eta swat hal 7rka m3nata tswe akthrr! W trbetii thanks god matsm7lii, so I will ignore her!

A WEEK PASSED BY,, w 3alla nafs el7ala!.. len ana mara dasha el9af after the break w kan kl el9af mwjud! W she was setting in a table w tgoul:

W tkhylw gam tgoul I lovee u waydd take care 3umre

Mne 39bt w magdrt amsk 3umre.

R7t benn elbanat w wgft wraha: walla 9j? , ok banat 9j mayhmne raykum w 6gag y6gkum bas ana wde afshl ha5he shwy ely mats7ti, so Nourra! Awal shay laish ghbtay 2 days? L2nch gltele anch you didnt feel well, but guess what? Gltele anch thayg khlgch l2nch Knty tklmen 9bay w yklm bnt khaltch.

6ab3an elbaaanat and nourra wyuhm kant speachless

Jawa: ok ymkn entaw mat9dgun w h bl6gag bas wait, shswetlch nourra 7ztha? 9j ana mu nu3e w akrah elbnat ely yklmun w 3ndhm s2alf le3eb w m9khara bas mah6etch 9khar, so alah yslmkm ya bnat 6la3 ely tklma y9er rfej my cousin, w 3ndkm man3 shlun a3rf the friend of cousin well ahle klhm y3rfuna w ehwa rfej my cousin mzman w ee kaifey noura ahle yrthun, anyway..I called my cousin w s2lta shfeh hatha rfejk klma laish che yswe 7ram elbnt! W gale ena kan ymr eb thruf w ehwa 9ar ensan thane, 9ar ythb6 ay bnt blshare3! 7ta law mayb7ha! W guess what shnu galle? Galee wakhray 3an hathe rfejtch l2na ehwa makan yrqm ela ay bnt jdama blshare3 fa aked khfefaa! Gtla lala Ma 3laik san3a! But I guess 8 was wrong, so aked tgoulom shdrana hatha cousin jawa?

LOL wyuhm speachless blthat Nourrra! W some of them gam y63umha dirty stares! L2na wayha kan m9dum w magalat wala ne9 klma! So t2kt mako abla w r7t 7g jn6ty, hthait my phone and I turned it on, I checked the time and it was about 11, 3ad fahad tbda m7athrta 11:15, I called him w klhm kamw more thwm shocked w 76aita speaker:

Fahad: alo hala jawa

Jawa: hala fahad bas bghait as2lk, wain lzwara lyoum?


Fahad tsthblen? Bait mama s'haam shnu fec zhaymar? W mu bldwam enty Jawa: fahad ush shwya w goule bas bthker shay nseta! Tathker lma dgait 3laik gbl ams w s2tlk 3n rfejk bader? Shgtle akher shay!

Fahad: ena 9ar ydkhn? w ythb6 banat khfaf may7bum!      

Jawa: w ba3ad?

Fahad: gtlch wakhray 3n rfejtch l2na ely thbhm khfaf w aked w7da mnhm w latg3den ma3a hal banat?
                         
Jawa: zain khala9 mshkur ethlff!

Fahad: zain laii...

6ou6 6ou6::

Some girls laughed, bas mskt th7kte:::
W nourra wayha film.

Jawa: so al7ien fhmtaw klshay, w knt Sakta 3shan mane atnaqash wyaa banat nags norra! Ba3ad ma wgft yamha yum kntw tth7kun 3laiha swat che! Bas noura emty ydeda? W lazm t3rfen ana maynwkl 7aggi fahma?...





shraykum bas blchapter? I love you tooo:::::♡♡  my twitter account to be updated: @LOVEINFECTION__ and my ask for any ques: www.ask.fm/LOVEINFECTION__

CHAPTER27

Oh no... 9ar elly knt khayfa mnaa! Fahad is a great guy w klshay! But its not the problem! There is a thing that you dont know? Awrad story!

Its along painfull story...

I will give you the short cut, awrad  loved some guy and she made a mistake.. she loved him from the depth of her heart and she was young! She talked to him and after 1 month..he dumped her with a lame excuse! After few months of trying to forget him and failing! He came back..telling her he was sorry and he want her back! She knew that it was wrong but the devil won! And she was happy! After one day he told her that he was playing on her! He left and she kept crying! She knew it was mistake...the hall thing talking to guy and such as! But it was mistake and shes not an angel..
Anyway its been a while..she still love Him but she cant do anything about it...

So you know awrad's story!and you know why i l didnt want fahad ena yt3alag feha!

Fahad: shfech sektay? Laykun t7bene?

Jawa: chub chub fahad::, anyway madre shgulk 9rat7n bas awrad ma3ndha swalf tklm 9byan w che! Im sorry

Fahad: ana mabe al3ab 3laiha! Ana abe atzwjha!bs atkhrj mn eljam3a ra7 atzwjha!

Jawa: y9er khair fahad!

Oh my god he look so heart broken:'(♡
Shswee ana:) ? Jawa: bnadeha elyoum bas en swait 7rkat aw bynt lha ab6 3younk.
     
Fahad smiled a wide smile: a7bch a7bch a7bch=))
             
Jawa: shaazaabbb

And I went to call the nurse  to bring my bag, she brought the bag..fahad helped me to put my stuff in and we checked out!

On our way to fahad's home...

Jawa: alaaahhh abiii starbucks

Fahad: mako

Jawa: tra magol 7g award tyye::?

Faj2a ksr elskan w dash lafat bucks

Jawa: kaaaaaaaaaakkkkk:'(Fahad: chub::, shnu tben t6lben?
         
We ordered and went back home, while parking:

Jawa: fahad laish che thalma, mu glt eljma3a byun?

Fahad: eee madre ymkn lel7ien mayaw

I took my drink and opened their house door...I opened the lights and...

......: SURPRISE!!!!!      

all myyy cousins w second cousins 'eljma3a'... including awrad and dalia!

Gam atlftt ymen ysar w achuf fahad shag eltha7ka ..

Jawa: 7giiiiii?.??.???? Fahad: habla? Eeee!
       
Jawa: abay a7bkum babche:'(((!!

Slmat 3laihum w I thanked them jad wnsune!!

Hamad: chufay elcake:::

Jawa: kaaaaakkkk ekyoutt! A7bkum jad jad jad

Kant 3alla 3akazat w jbs wheelchair w mktub "saalaamaatt yal grgaa  ♡"
                                                             

We spent the night talking..messing around playing truth or dare janjfa w cheee...its 12:30 jad elwakt 6af!



Awrad: yala jawa bamshe ana, mu tnsen 6al3tna bacher ha Jawa: khala9 okay!,, byeee zftaaa!
                   
Awrad: byee zfta::::  

3eesa: baskm 6al3at ma tkhl9un! Ana ma6la3 kthrkm!

Awrad: mushkltk ent nerd mat6la3! E7na n7b nstans fa n6la3=))

Jawa: kaaaakk kafch!

And she left! lfait 3lla fahad wayha kan t3abera tth7k!::: bas dalia w awrad ra7w! Eljma3a klhm ga3den:)...l3bna uno kora r7na eljm3ya shfna film ykhr3 len 9 am! Kna nabe ntryg bas ma gdrna.. g3dna 3al 3...

SETTING IN THE HALL OF FAMMEEE
AND THE WORLD GONNA KNOW YOUR NAMEE Jawa: abay shahen mayth7k ana masma3 the script  shako tsm3hm shnu bnya?:"(!

Shahen: chubb ekhty kant tsm3ha w 3lgt fene!
                     

DO IT FOR YOU COUNTRY DO IT FOR YOUR NAME SETTING IN THE HALL OF FAMEE

Jawa: mayth7k telfone mnu gam yrn:)!! Shhal el ghnya ana bnya masm3ha.

Shahen*declining the phone call*: chub telfone maksor w makjth telfone ekhtii
                                         
Hamad: haaa laish matrd ell7ub ha?;)

Shahen: fech 3ane 7amad

Awrad called w ya letne mardait Awrad: KL HATHA NUM W GAYLEN EB N6LA3 KHYASS NOUM YALA RDAY ELBAIT W AMRCHHHHH YAALAAAAA

We went out had a great time and went back..






AFTER 3 MONTHS AND HALF:

the summer vocation started and finished! It was great we travelled a bit! Went to the chalets we made parties, gathering 6l3at ba7ar w adventures...

Bader didnt got off my mind, I think about him day and night.. but destiny didnt brought us together, I thought that would make me forgot him just a bit, but no. I hope im on his mind like he is, but I expect not! Every music every beat remind me of him, this is torture but I like having him in the depth of my heart!..



So school started, its my last year in school, sara is not in my class but that didn't change our friendship! We spend breaks, I go to her classroom between the classes we go out and etc..

I didnt know alot girls in this class, but there is this nice girl called noura, she is so sweet! Kla tg3ad yamme w t7wel tsulf so she is my new class mate and I like her!..but nourra is also a new girl in the school, so I took her with me to sara so we can be all friends..

Everything is going fin nomal and boring until one day...

I woke up went to school, nourra was absent.. klsh mu 3adt'ha tgheb?

Second day, she is still absent?.. okay there is something  wrong... in the break I told sara! She told me to check her twitter account today because she have her.

I went home sat with my family a bit, ate then I went upstair to my room I did my homework then I checked sara following, and I found her?  I found her kik in the bio and I told sara to kik her because I dont have a kik, I find it silly and useless. Anyway sara gave me her number and I called her:

Jawa: aloo?nourra?

Nourra: a-alo hala jawa shlunch *she said with low voice*

jawa: zaina el7mdlah, salamt 3asa ma shar

Nourra: mashar, bas 9ayrtle salfa w 7de maly khlg adawm, tgdren tyen le elyom? I will tell you everything! W blmra anwl mnch!

Jawa: khla9 as2l ahle w aklmch

Nourra: ok bye


I went down stairs and asked my father he said ok, as long as la shghel bldrasa enshala bait rfejty eb duubai 3ade arou7:)! W etha glt brou7 spoons galaw b3ed:)!


I texted her to send me her house adress...


W9lt baitha! 6l3tle w khthtne to her room, she didnt look okay! At. All.

jawa: shfech?

Khshmha 9ar a7mar

Nourra: but dont judge me ok?, ana knt aklm 9bay 7baita 7ail w wthqt feh..w ma glt 7g bntt khalty! Ehya wayd greba mne! Bas madre laish ma glt ha, one day kna ga3drn bru7na w galtle bgulch shay! Ana aklm wa7d a7va w che, glt zain 3shan ana ba3ad agulha! I listened to her story and I had a smile, kant nafs my story andvi was happy, youm galtle elesm wayhe en9fg! It was the same BADER I was talking to... *and she started crying hrr heart out*

I froze,  there is thousands of bader in kuwait but the chance of him being that bader? Is scary SOOO scary

jawa: haday haday labchen , I will try to help you akhle my cousins yzfuna!, ehwa shnu 3aylta?

I was almost sweating, waiting her to say his last name

Nourra: al x

uhhh! El7mdlah I feel released!

Jawa: shlun kl shay bda?

Nourra: ehwa shwy mshhur eb twitter..

Glge nqzne bas come on 3aylta mo ehya la tflmen jawa!

Nourra:Shufay hatha acounta chan t3rfena aw mar 3laich w egray eldm shlun kan ysulf.. she handed me the phone..

and I wish I never saw....

it was my bader..

CHAPTER26

Awal shay asfa wayd wayd 3al ta2kher... I promise you awal ma ard mn elsufar I will spoil you with posts xo.. now enjoy this one :p


I woke up in the same bed feeling way better than the last time I woke up, but this time the room was dark and there was nobody no noise no worried people around me..
But there was one person wearing white clothes, is that an angel? Chub jawa it was the doctor -.- 3an khayrch lazm tmthlen eb bollywood enty::
       
Anyway...

The doctor: ha jawa.. are you feeling better

I mummled something I guess it was yeah He started explaining what happened earlier...

The doctor: ely 9ar shay 6be3e 7ail.. fkrat ena you put a new organ in a body system..shwy 9a3ba! The system and the organ has to adjust  fa mako ela el3afyaa enshala

Jawa: okay mshkur doctor..mu lazm tgoul 7g ommi 9a7 ?                  

The doctor: la jawa lazm.. ahlch lazm y3rfun bkl t6wr. Ana adre omch wayd t7ate bas lazm
     
Jawa: khala9 okay.    
                                                                 
My mother came...3omrha 6wel::    
     
Mom: ha docotor bashher!

And the doctor told her everything:)! Even details that I dont remember! W lazm ommi tkhtr3 w the usual questions w loya:)!
                                       
Mom: shlun, laish? Ra7 yn3ad hal shay ? Elajheza el*electronya t2ther 3ala galbha?

Jawa: shaku shaku:'(?

The doctor laughed and gave me the 'fhmt laish maknty tbene agoul 7g omch'

The doctor: ekhty la t7aten hatha shay 6bee3e w kna mtwq3ena asasn, w bntch al7ien 97tha zaina w bttrkh9 elyoum enshala

Mom: alah ybshrk blkhair doc, matg9er

The doctor: hatha elwajb ma swaina shay He winked at me and left.

Mom: akheran b6l3unch hay9ay!

Jawa: eeehh wanaaasa

Actually I wasnt... weird right?

Anyway my mother gave me along speach about my health w el electronics devises mu zain astkhdmhm:), I thought my mother was engineer? Since when she became a doctor?:) a knock on the door intruppted us *thanks god*

It was fahaaad my cousin

Jawa: FAHAAAAD

mom: hala fahad shlunck?

Salam 3ala omii w ya 9ubi  Fahad: walla w lch wa7sha yal de3laa

Jawa: mnu de3la?:)

Salam 3alay w trb3 3al frash...twna bnsulf chan my mother tgoum

Mom: yala jawa ana bru7 eldwam..fahad derbalk 3alla hal m9rg3a

Fahad laughing: enshala khalty

And my mother left..

Jawa: ha goulee shswait eb dubai? R7t concert? Alaahhh david kan mnak:')! Goule kl elhyata bltfa9el?


Fahad: bsmlah khal at7cha 36ene fur9a, eee 7ara r7t concert 7bebch *w gma y6g rgba y7rne*

We kept talking, he showed me pictures and videos...then he started playing with his phone and I started thinking.. I was happy for leaving the hospital but I was kinda disappointed...

You know while I was here, I could see bader more often when he visits me with his brother and some time sister! Even if he didnt want to or doesn't care! Atleast I could see him and make sure that he is fine and okay..!  But not any more..      This love is pointless

                     

                   But honest

           This love is hurtful 

                               

                But mean full

              This love is big

      But hiding in side my heart           

I slept while over thinking.... and since I was thinking about bader.. indeed he has a part in it...

It was a big zwara im my uncle's farm! Bader was there, a girl relative was with him and it I knew that girl, I was with dalia and awrad in the duwania! I secretly wanted to see bader so I started thinking and I got an idea, they Idea was that we ask that girl and bader to watch a scary movie with us, dalia and awrad didnt agree because the dvd was in hunted scary place in the farm but I insist... we went to them! I started talking to girl but bader was in the far corner looking at us! The girl agreed and asked which movie? I answered: im sorry mama! And it was actually a song I listened to recently  ! Bader said: yma! And came near the girl and payed more attention! I said: khala9 ana ayeb eldvd player.. bader and the girl: okay, as im leaving bader played with my hair! I felt nervous and I had goose bumps ' قشعريرة' I woke up scared and i was shaking!

             

Fahad: bsmlah..shfech?

Jawa: lay7ushk..night mare          

Fahad: 7sbale 3ndch salfa, tra omch dgat 3alay galtle ena al7ien brkh9unch Ana asa3dch al7ien tswen aghrathch l2na ntrden baitna! Btnamen 3ndna 

Jawa: alaaahh mzman mu ray7a baitkum a7s!

Fahad: e7sasch hndi y7b yflm::

Jawa: chuub! 

 I got up and went to the bathroom and did my business! I got out to see fahad laying in the bed *hatha ely bsa3dne:)*

I started doing my bag, I noticed that fahad 7sait kan wda ygoul shay bas mtrded!, ma glt shay!adre ena bgule.

After serval minutes..

Fahad: tra el39aba klhm byun! Ygoulon wlhanen 3laich..mn zeench.

Jawa: :$ee sh7laty Fahad imitating me: mayth7k

Jawa: abayy chub=))

Fahad: zain sm3ay mm shsma,, etha tben gulay 7g shsmha rfejatch hathek shsmha tyee                           

                                       

Jawa: shsmha haa?    

Fahad: chub, khala9 latyee mu lazm

Jawa: haha khla9 okay::

I was about to leave to call the nurse to bring my bag when...

Fahad: jawa a7bhaa

Jawa:.....

CHAPTER25

Dad: jawa swulch 3mlya w ghyraw glbch.. you have been unconscious for 2 days *ghyboba*  w el7mdlah you are now healthy w 97tch mafeha ay mushkla

He said with a wide smile but also worrying about how will I re-act ....


I was shocked! The organ that is inside me beating is not mine!! And how they could not tell me? The doctor said they will change my heart but I didnt thought that soon! Where is my old heart? Did bader left with it? Or he is moving in my new one?

A hot big tear ran down my cheeks

Jawa: laish ma gltuli?


I am happy. . But I was shocked I was happy cause im not sick anymore.. and that my heart is working just fine!    

Khaled: jawa ahm shay anch al7ien zaina..tra nader a7ad yt3alj aw y6la3 mn hal marath eb hal s'hula!  W e7na kna lagen galb 97e mn awal shay bas ma ngdar nkhr3ch! L2na faj2a dshena eb hal azma! W nadr3 etha bngoulch you will panic and panicking mara7 ysa3dch eb 3mletch bas ykhrb 3laich l2na elbeats y9erun asra3 w 7achi malch shghel feh.. la t3wren rasch ahm shay anch al7ien 97tch zaina tra kna ga3den 3ala a39abna na6rench tft7en shd3wa ma nstahel thak7a?::


I smiled the widest smile of the history of wide smile in the universe, , come on?shloun math7k?        

Sloom: th7kat th7kaaat:::


Suddenly every one gamw eyun 3nd my bed yhnune 3alla slamtii w swalf w loyaa w flowers, 3ad I hate flowers bas elly yabuhm 3ajeben  jaaaaad! Thats how I spent the night.. some nurse came....

Nurse: excuse me.. visitors are jot are not allowed now! The patient need to rest!                                                






They all said goodbyes...

Mom: but I can stay right? Im her mother?

Nurse: no sorry you can come in the early morning..


I tried getting up from my bad to assure my mom that im okay! But of course I couldn't:) beside all the pain that rushed in my veins as I tried to get up, I was connected to stupid wires and medical devices. .. I hold my tears and forced a smile as I turned my face to my mother...


Jawa: mama please la t7aten ana mne many mt7rka w t3rfen noumi thgel entaw btyun w loya w khab9a! W ana still nayma!! Mama please please la t7aten w khu entay mu7a6tne bl9ba7 3shan ngoul khr6e w mu safe.  76etene eb royal 7yat 9dgene wayd safe w klshay! W a7lfch btyen w klman byye w swalf w I will be still sleeping



She smiled and said...

Mom: 7yaty enty! Khala9 ana al7ien brou7 bas deray balch 7ta el7mam etha btgoumin dosay 3al dugma w ohma eyoun! Moo bru7ch! W etha tben tmshen t7rken eldam eb jsmch tnadenhm ohma yshelon elwires w yaa3dunch

She got up as she kissed my forhead and left after saying goodbye..

As she left I cried my heart out! I dont know why but I did it I cried so hard that I started to feel pain in my heart but I didnt stopped crying...

I dried my tears as I pushed the button to call a nurse....she came:

Nurse: yes? Whats wrong?

Jawa: I want to walk..im tried of setting



She disconnected some wires w yabt el3kasa madre elchair tsndt 3laih w I started walking...

A7s my organs are moving  mn el3war bas I ignored it w I started walking slowly.. I got out of my rooms and started walking in the halls..I peeked in the rooms..klaa old people or pregnant woman.. it suck being the youngest and the most sick person in here:)! Even in school I was always the strongest I used to play every sport! I was the achool manican! But now? Im afraid of going there! T3rfun ely klhum y6al3unch eb nathrat elly 7ram:(! Yes wai3. Ugh t3bt!

I went back to my room! And I called the nurse so she connect the wires again...

I laid in the bed but my heart is aching! Im in pain...


The nurse came and she connected the wires.. but rhe device started making sound *pep pep pep* numbers was increasing.. the nurse looked worried..

Ok gam akhtr3?

She called the doctor and the sound is getting lowder and faster!

I can feel my heart beating so hard! Its like his fighting!

I felt cold and numb.. shsalfa laykun ga3d amout?

The docotor came and before he check me say anything I blacked out...



sorry wayd 3al ta2kher bas ana msafra! Hope u liked the post and I would love it if you leave comments xoxo